Im on the crazy shit

Post-Op, they would alternate needles of something (I dont remember what) with 3 crushed extra strenght Tylenol, and I would survive. and feel ok. The shots made me a little woozy, in the sense that I would often very slightly hallucinate by dreaming with my eyes open, but being alert enough to know I was not in my full capacity, if that makes sense. It would take the immediate pain away while leaving me able to respond to minimal recquirement (shake head, squeeze hand, go to the bathroom aided, drink water, etc).

Then, I made the ultimate mistake on my departure day to have a conversation with a nurse about the pros and cons of smoking MJ vs being on pain meds. The nurse asked me if I smoked regularly, and I said occasionally rather. She came back a few hours later with my papers for leaving, and explained to me my meds. She said the pills were about 1.5 to 2X stronger than the needle because of my drug use history (...) to which I replied that the needle had been plenty, I didnt need anything stronger. She said hospital procedure. Ok then.

So off I go, get the meds, start taking them. I didnt read the paper that comes with it because I honestly was not in a reading state of mind. Ayoye, if you get my drift. I start taking the prescribed dosage, 4mg of PMS-HYDROMORPHINE HYDROCHLORIDE


Explanation:

hydromorphone hydrochloride

[-môr′fōn]

an opioid analgesic. A synthetic derivative of morphine used as a respiratory sedative and analgesic that is more potent than morphine.

indication It is used to treat moderate to severe pain.

contraindications It is used with caution in many conditions, including head injuries, asthma, impaired renal or hepatic function, or unstable cardiovascular status. Known hypersensitivity to this drug prohibits its use.

adverse effects Among the most serious adverse effects are drowsiness, dizziness, nausea, constipation, respiratory and circulatory depression, bizarre dreams and hallucinations, and drug addiction.

 

 

Um, what the fuck is this shit they gave me? After  24hrs of taking it, I was tripping balls in a really bad way. I was paranoid to the psychotic point. I started randomly talking really fast, moving really fast only to feel dizzy and slide to the floor. My claustrophobia kicked in with a major Ass Kicking session, where I would cry there was no more air and shake (and I dont know if you know this but crying when you have your tonsils cut out is not fun. As well as hiccuping and yawning. Ouch.) A whole lot of other fun things. I remember sitting there, feeling my heartbeat jump, feeling like my skin was crawling and it was so important that I get up for some reason, but I couldnt move my body at all. I have never in my life felt like this before.

 

Then my mom mom made the decision for me, and took my pills away. Before that, we consulted my cousin and my older sister, both who are nurses with years of experience. They said the same thing, that that was way too much drugs, and if I could handle it, that it would be best if I switched immediately to Tylenol. Case in point.

 

So now Im in suffering nightmare, BUT Im not being all fucked up on some pills that seem to do worst than they do good. I dont understand docs. Out of all the possible meds out there, why prescribe something so harmful? Why is it better to give something like that over prescribing straight marijuana (except for inability to smoke for any reason)? Isnt there something more natural than synthetic morphine that could help me somehow without causing dependance??